Life

First and foremost, I would like to say that my postings are NOT a cry for help. If I want help I'll ask. I'm not incapable of asking for help/advice. I've done it plenty of times before. It may be that I don't want advice from anyone involved in my situation and want an outside view. An unbiased opinion. And just because that opinion is given doesn't mean that I will follow it to make my decisions on life choices. My choices are my own. Anyone who KNOWS me, would realize that trying to influence them, when influence isn't desired, will only make me want to go against the influence more. Just because a "medical professional" has given me advice doesn't mean I'm going to folllow it. It may be in consideration, or on the table, but making decisions for me to "persuade" me is only going to push me away from you and in the opposite direction of your persuation. I don't follow all the suggestions of a "medical professional," if I did most people I know would be alienated, because they've fucked me one way or another.
On another note...got ALL my homework done, mostly on time. The part that wasn't done "on time" I was given extra time for. And I only took about 14 extra hours. Woot for me. My best friend from highschool had her baby girl today. Congrats! And welcome to the world Kylie!
Organizing kids clothing while some is dirty, in bags/boxes and in other unknown areas is not a good idea....or maybe it is. I've decided anything I find after the organized boxes are closed, are going to donation.
Being told that what is suppose to be your home isn't your home is a sobering fact. There is no "home" any more for me. What a happy fucking holiday season.
Spent MORE than an adequate amount of time on trying to get my Short Term Disability (STD--funny I know) payments to come through...with no avail.
Was approved for the apartment I applied for, however, it is gone. Luckily the one right next to it should be openning up "soon." As in within the next two weeks or so...of course RIGHT after I go back to work.
I'm tired of drawing the short straws. I feel like I do everything possible to avoid these "short straw" situations. I think I'm too nice. I plan to be meaner in the future. I used to not give a fuck about what people thought about what I said or did. I was happier then. Now I walk on eggshells for everyone for fear of alienation, and yet I'm still alone. If you can't say what's on your mind then how the hell can you relate to anyone?
Hoping to get into my new apartment before Christmas. We will see. I need some stability in my life and so do my children. Getting tired of my son crying for my mom instead of me. I used to think it took a village to raise a child. Now I believe it takes just one person to raise a child and the village ruins the bond.
Hopefully getting that military money for school soon. Was suppose to visit my second son's father's family this week, but it doesn't look like its going to happen. It's unfortunate but it's what happens I suppose. Going to rest my head now, and hopefully put my worries out of my head. Watch some Harry Potter and fall fast asleep. Until my little one wakes up. Until next time.